Everyone hates politics, just like everyone hates human waste. Unfortunately, the world can’t turn without ‘em both. On the plus side, at least the former doesn’t smell all the time (unless you’re impartial to ol’ whiskey). Today though, politics are pretty, pretty… pretty popular.

Today, of course, is Election Day. If you’re unaware of this, you either a.) live in Morocco, b.) live under a rock, or c.) are an absolute recluse, who happened to find internet today. In that case, welcome aboard, the future is now, and here’s the lowdown: Republican candidates John McCain and Sarah Palin are going against Democratic candidates Barack Obama and Joe Biden in what is being called, “The 2008 Presidential Election.” It’s a pretty big deal, especially considering the last eight years have been an absolute joke, and the laughter stopped sometime after America (see: Bush Administration) decided to pull a re-run of the Gulf War.

Regardless of the past, today is all about the present. Well, actually no, it’s all about the future. So whether or not you’re voting for McCain or Obama (Whatever the case, just get out there!), the excitement should be at your fingertips, racing and coursing through with electrified tension. To celebrate, we’ve come up with some politically charged “numbers” to get you movin’ and shakin’.

So, after you’re done voting, mosey on back and “pump up the volume”…

10. Black Flag - “Rise Above”

It might seem like a cliche at this point, but “Rise Above” is just a balls to the wall, throw ‘em up in the air,   politically motivated song. Written by Greg Ginn, the opening track off of the band’s 1981 debut, Damaged, is probably the first thing every kid should hear on their thirteenth birthday. The chorus is anthemic (”We are tired of your abuse/Try to stop us its no use”), the rhythm is heavy, and the aggression is immature yet focused. If you missed out on this baby in middle school, do yourself a favor and kick up a riot.

9. The Rolling Stones - “(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction”

Everyone recognizes the signature guitar riff, the bouncy bass, the shuffling drums, and the hallway cat calls of Mick Jagger. Yes, this is quite possibly one of the most overplayed songs in radio history yet there’s a reason for it. It bounces, it pops, it moves, and it shakes. Hell, the infamous hook, “I can’t get no/Satisfaction”, could have sold this song alone. Yet this track, which originally appeared on the Stones’ 1965 diamond album, Out of Our Heads, is a historic landmark in rock n’ roll, let alone in songs to “rile” up the crowds, even if it isn’t necessarily about politics. And please, by all means, pull out your best Jack Black (of High Fidelity) impersonations and berate me to death!

8. Nine Inch Nails - “Capital G”

For being such a recluse, Trent Reznor (of NIN) sure knows how to throw some fire around. If his past efforts, The Downward Spiral or the double billed The Fragile, didn’t sell you on this idea, then perhaps last year’s concept album, Year Zero, did. Sure, he tackled the war in “The Good Soldier”, the paranoia and disturbing culture that is Americana in “Survivalism”, yet it was “Capital G”, with its marching drumbeats, wicked programming, and ultra-distortion that really brought things into perspective. A year later, it has never been so relevant. Oh, it also rocks, too… if that’s any consideration.

7. U2 - “Sunday Bloody Sunday”

Even if South Park declared Bono the world’s largest bowel movement, at the end of the day, Trey Parker and Matt Stone still aren’t responsible for The Joshua Tree, The Unforgettable Fire, and War. That’s okay, we’re not asking them to be. However, give some credit where credit’s due. Amongst all that Irish excess, there lies a great body of songs from U2. One of them happens to be the iconic epic, “Sunday Bloody Sunday.” To be honest, if you don’t move in the slightest, you might want to see a therapist or consider yourself legally dead. This track, which opened one of the band’s finest albums, 1983’s War, is everything a politically charged song should be. Hence why after all these years, people still beat their hands together and cowl at the chorus.

6. John Lennon - “Gimme Some Truth”

When then ex-Beatle John Lennon screamed, “Im sick and tired of hearing things/From uptight, short-sighted, narrow-minded hypocritics,” everyone probably said, “Well, you know what? Me too!” That’s what makes the bluesy yet psychedelic number off of his 1971 solo success, Imagine, so timeless. Here’s this English lad, saying it how it is… or was… or is. Whatever the case, it still works, and that’s why it’s friggin’ on here.

5. The Who - “Won’t Get Fooled Again”

Before CSI snagged all the band’s tunes for its crummy television programs, The Who used to represent something ideal and promising. When they weren’t smashing instruments or running over their chauffeurs, the punkish quartet put together some immaculate lyrics. Actually, Pete Townshend did, but these words would be nothing without the energy behind it. There are plenty of examples of this throughout the band’s discography, and especially on Who’s Next, the finished product of what was originally planned to be Townshend’s Lifehouse epic. On this song, the band continued soaring high, with timeless concoctions like “Baba O’Riley”, “Bargain”, and of course, the politics-laden favorite, “Won’t Get Fooled Again.” When Daltrey screams, “Yeah!”, you can’t help but want to slide on the floor, pry open the floorboards, and bite into whatever is underneath. Now, put that over a crowd-an agitated one-and you’ll see the wonders of politics come into play.

4. Creedence Clearwater Revival - “Fortunate Son”

Sure, the song’s been used on commercials, movies (Forrest Gump comes to mind), and probably half a million baseball games, but that shouldn’t discount its lyrical content. Originally released on Creedence Clearwater Revival’s fourth record, Willy and the Poor Boys, “Fortunate Son” is a strong anti-war statement that resonates nearly forty years later. When that drumming hums in and that guitar lick slides by, it’s not only sexy musically, but ultimately accessible by nature. This one is usually good when there’s traffic and you’re just about to snap.

3. Public Enemy - “Fight The Power”

Thank the heavens for Public Enemy. Even if Flava Flav is a whore to MTV nowadays (or is it VH1?), it’s nice to pull out the old records and remember when the group was actually relevant. Anybody and their mother could chalk up the group’s best song, but director Spike Lee beat everyone to the punch, when he used “Fight The Power” in his 1989 masterpiece, Do The Right Thing. Naturally, while the song punched up the film’s soundtrack on the charts, it was the corresponding album that made all the difference. To date, few hip-hop albums have challenged the prowess and jaw dropping ecstasy that was in the politically drenched third album, Fear of a Black Planet. For what it’s worth, what other song tells Elvis to fuck off?

2. The Clash - “I’m So Bored With the U.S.A”

Simple math equation. The Clash + “I’m So Bored With the U.S.A” = Problem Solved. Feeling angst? Ticked off at your neighbor? Your boss? Your girlfriend cheating on you? Someone eat your lunch? Someone make you eat your lunch? Is there a nagging sensation at the bottom of your foot? Is there only .34 cents in your bank account? Does work suck? Are you not dreaming? Is your life a proverbial cul de sac? If you answer yes to any or all of the above questions, then good Lord, play this song as soon as possible. Oh and one other thing, rinse and repeat.

1. Bruce Springsteen - “Born in the U.S.A.”

What would a political list of songs be without the inclusion of The Boss? Bruce Springsteen is an American institution, and if the nation were pressed to choose one songwriter to represent the country at hand, it would be him without a doubt. Sure, some might lump him in with New Jersey trash like Jon Bon Jovi, but they’re the same idiots who think the world’s flat, that Earth is the center of the universe, and that “Born in the U.S.A.” is a great song for a Republican campaign night. Oh wait, that last part actually happened. The idiot? Whoever chose the songs for President Reagan’s 1984 campaign.

Of course, anyone who actually listened to the song’s snide commentary on American politics might actually know that this is not a happy go lucky, bouncing ball number, but a very, very sarcastic anthem. Even the song’s first verse reveals this truth: “Born down in a dead man’s town/The first kick I took was when I hit the ground/You end up like a dog that’s been beat too much/’Til you spend half your life just covering up.” What were they thinking, right?

Regardless, this popular single gave the finger to American politics, and yet rowled up the American populace at the time. Though with Springsteen at the wheel, it’s not too hard to see how this happened. The man has an eye out for America, and even if you don’t agree with him, you’ll accept his debate.

Or else…

Well, that’s it, folks. Hope these weren’t too traditional for you. Were there some missing? Of course. A list without Neil Young (”Southern Man”, “Keep On Rocking in the Free World”), Bob Dylan (pretty much anything he wrote in the ’60s), and Weird “Al” Yankovic (”Eat It”, “Amish Paradise”) seems like a mockery, but then again, it’s not your list.

Let’s hear a round of applause, an “Amen!”, and a “U.S.A! U.S.A! U.S.A!” Shall we?

Categories: CoS Exclusive Features, Features, List 'Em Carefully
Tags: Black Flag, Bruce Springsteen, Creedence Clearwater Revival, NIN, Public Enemy, The Clash, The Rolling Stones, The Who, U2