When we reported earlier this month that Ryan Adams was set to join The Awl as guest contributor, we had no idea guest contributor meant video game reviewer. But that’s exactly what Mr. Adams did for his debut column on the site when he shared his thoughts on 1981 arcade game Gorf.

The musician/author/painter/Norah Jones collaborator‘s assessment goes something like this: “Playing Gorf is like getting wasted, or what I remember about getting wasted: It’s loud, it’s confusing, there are a bunch of lights going off, people (robots) are shooting at you, you need pizza, etc., then its game over. Of course you just play the thing again but as my pops once told me ‘You lose when you drop the quarter in.’ What an ass. He obviously never heard the whole ‘Don’t hate the player, hate the game’ thing, but then he never was much of a gangsta.”

Fortunately, it doesn’t end there. All in all, Adam’s review spans two pages, manages to incoporate Danzig, and provides level by level commentary. Hit up The Awl to read the masterpiece in its entirety. Or you could just watch the reviewer in action below — thank Mrs. Mandy Moore Adams for the camera work.