It’s a big week, kids. Jay Leno returns to late night, or more accurately, late evening. His new primetime show debuts this week and he’s lined up some big names. Even if you’re not a fan of his, you have to give him props for scoring Jay-Z with Rihanna and Kanye on Monday and Bruce Hornsby and Eric Clapton on Friday. Not too shabby.

Also of note is the return of Carson Daly, whose show I fully expected to just dissolve seeing as he’d been in reruns for months now. Alas, he’s back with a pretty good lineup (Metric anyone?). The rest of this week’s guests are a smattering of anything you can think of. A little Megadeth to go with your Rufus Wainwright? A touch of Dave Matthews Band to wash down your Yeah Yeah Yeahs? Don’t mind if I do.

Here’s your Late Night Lobotomy.

Mon—Maxwell*
Tues—Kelly Clarkson
Wed—Pink
Fri—Shakira

Mon—Rufus Wainwright
Tues—Ghostface Killah
Thurs—Megadeth
Fri—Keri Hilson

Mon—Dave Matthews Band
Tues—Phoenix
Wed—Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Fri—Nelly Furtado

Mon—Cage the Elephant*
Tues—Care Bears on Fire*
Wed—John Fogerty*

Mon—Franz Ferdinand
Tues—Metric
Wed—Pete Yorn
Thurs—Emily Wells

Mon—Juliette Lewis

Mon—Jay-Z featuring Rihanna and Kanye West
Wed—Miley Cyrus
Thurs—Bruce Hornsby and Eric Clapton

Stay tuned, folks!