Got tens of thousands of dollars lying in wait to donate for Haitian earthquake victims? Might as well get something priceless out of it. Right now, a Haiti benefit auction for several priceless goods (and services) is up on eBay, brought to you by Emily Eavis, the Glastonbury Festival co-organizer (via Pitchfork). Among the prizes: Arctic Monkeys frontman Alex Turner’s guitar (currently £3,000), Chris Martin’s “Viva La Vida” tour jacket signed by all four members of Coldplay (£6,600), and The Magic Numbers performing a private acoustic gig in your house (£2,050; only open to U.K. residents).

That last one is pretty sweet (understatement) but it’s pretty hard to top what Damon Albarn is offering. The britpop icon, recently confirmed to appear with that animated band of his in the desert, will write and record a song for the high bidder. Per the item description:

The sucessful bidder will own a recording of a composition especially written performed and recorded by Damon Albarn for their exclusive personal use (*subject to terms & conditions). * The winning bidder will need to sign a contract before receiving this piece of music.

Albarn will retain the copyright, according to the auction page, but it’s your song, and you decide whether or not anyone else ever hears it. The price? Currently £5,100, and there’s six days left — the auction ends February 2nd. Proceeds from all auctions benefit Oxfam International; click on the link to donate without vying for a chance at the coolest thing you’ll ever have.