Best Music of 2011CoS Exclusive FeaturesDissected

Dissected: The Rest of 2011

on December 21, 2011, 12:00pm

Welcome to a special edition of Dissected, where we usually disassemble a band’s catalog in the abstract, but we’ve decided to take 2011 via some stray thoughts and figures that fell through the cracks in our Annual Report. It’s exact science by way of a few beers.

Filing away the years becomes harder as you get older. Not because things are less significant, but because the memory is decaying at frustrating speeds. The cancer of time is tenacious son of a bitch, and it tends to erase things you once thought were important in favor of some benign fact like the drive-thru attendant at Taco Bell had two name tags and one said “Taco Belle.”

Year-end summaries, lists, recaps, and reports are just study guides for an exam that’s never happening, you guys. To me it’s less about ranking or quantifying albums and songs and more about a way to organize and remember what I might have otherwise forgotten about because I can’t remember anything anymore. So, before we close the file cabinet on 2011, here are some stray pieces that we’ve yet to organize, with some opinions thrown in for good measure. Let’s remember 2011 the way it was experienced: together while we argue over music.

Jeremy D. Larson
Content Director 

 

Instrument of the Year: Saxophone

Best Rock Doc: Pearl Jam Twenty

Best Box Set: The Beach Boys – The Smile Sessions

Essential Pop Culture Book of the Year: Simon Reynolds - Retromania

Best Record Label Design Aesthetic: Sacred Bones Records

Best Record Only a Few Lucky People Nabbed on Record Store Day: Big Star - Third

Best Band Twitter Accounts: Unknown Mortal Orchestra, Heems, El-P, and Titus Andronicus

Worst Twitter Account: Eminem

Worst Interview: Eminem interviewing Yelawolf over Twitter.

Funniest Last Name of the Year: Woon

Lil B The BasedGod’s Use of Machiavelli As a Portmanteau, While More Strained, Is Better Than Wacka Flocka’s Use of It Because : Lil B spelled it correctly.

Album Title That Appealed Exclusively to Photographers: Bibio – Mind Bokeh

Album Art That Appealed Exclusively to No One I Know (At Least Publicly): Mr. Muthafuckin eXquire – Lost in Translation

Quickest Slide From New to Nostalgic: Turntable.fm

Best Reunion: Pulp

Somewhere In The Middle: Death from Above 1979

Also Reunited: The Monkees

Possible Thesis Topic for 2011 #1: Sandwitches and Video Games: How Punk Subversion Lost Its Teeth Through the Over-Saturation of Shock Lyrics and Good Looks.

What Two Rappers Should Hook Up Based Solely on How Filthy Their Sex Would Be: Danny Brown (“I Will”) and Nicki Minaj (“Dance A$$ remix”)

What Two Indie Stars Should Hook Up Based on How Gothy Their Sex Would Be: Erika M. Anderson (“Marked”) and Wes Eisold (“Villains Of The Moon”)

Best Music Twitter Hashtag Joke: #awfulsupergroups (Aerosmith Black Mambazo, YelaWolf Parade, Brand New Kids on the Bloc Party, Vanilla Iceage, SUPERDUPERHeavy, etc… )

The One Thing MTV Did Right This Year: Adele performing “Someone Like You” at the MTV Music Video Awards

Most Sincere Live Cover of Steve Winwood: Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr.

Short Guitar Strap Buddies: Ruban Nielson of UMO and John Dwyer of Thee Oh Sees

Possible Thesis Topic for 2011 #2: LOL at LMFAO: How This Avuncular Duo Continues to Make Millions Existing in a Patrón-Soaked Never Never Land

What the Fuck Am I Even Supposed to Believe in Now That Thurston Moore and Kim Gordon Have Split?: I don’t fucking know.

Possible Thesis Topic for 2011 #3: Bari-Saxy: The Re-Branding of the Saxophone As Texturally Essential (Or “Hey Doobie Brothers, You’re No Longer Ironic!”)

John Maus’ “Believer” Is a Great Song, But It’s Partially Ruined Not Because of His Statements Against Indie Record Stores, But Because Every Time I Hear It I Hear: Melissa Etheridge’s “I Want to Come Over”

Best Party in a Library:  Built to Spill & Atlas Sound at Carnegie Library

Remember When 50 Cent Said He Was Going to Write a Novel About Playground Bullying: You do now.

“Hey, that’s Ghostface! But, that’s not Ghostface.”: Action Bronson

Best Ever First Move by a Patient Leaving a Psychiatric Facility: Gucci Mane getting a tattoo of triple-scoop ice cream on his face. Burr.

Artist With the Best Butch Cassidy Impression: Nick Oliveri

Artist With the Best Tony Montana Impression: Big Boi

Possible Thesis Topic for 2011 #4: No, Cirrus-ly: The Year Google, Apple, Spotify, et al. Put Music in the Clouds

Best Time I Had With Readers of CoS: Hanging out in the chat room at the webcast of the final LCD Soundsystem show at MSG

The Scariest Thing That Happened in 2011: Miley Cyrus covered Gorillaz.

The Scariest Thing That May Happen in 2012: SOPA

The Best Thing That Happened in 2011: This kid. By 1,000 miles.

The Best Thing to Happen in 2012: Your call. Make it happen.

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Year in Art 2011
3 comments

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Pypopscc
December 22, 2011 at 2:02 am

Best thing that happened this year was CoS getting rid of the stupid mobile site that I couldn’t exit out of. It made following this site religiously really really tough.

Thanks for another great year of the best music site on the web!

nicktro
December 21, 2011 at 5:57 pm

at work, but i swear on my life, the first thing i do when i get home is listen to that steve motherfucking winwood cover.

David Buchanan
December 21, 2011 at 5:47 pm

Best Dissected Of 2011 Joke: Moore/Gordon Split Shattering the Hopes and Dreams of Aged Grunge Kids Everywhere. God is Dead, Now. Yep.

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