Welcome to Dissected, where we disassemble a band’s catalog in the abstract. It’s exact science by way of a few beers.
In his 2006 review of The Doors: Perception box set, Pitchfork’s Stuart Berman wrote, “The Doors aren’t so much a band as a phase you go through, rarely to be visited again, like so much of the high-school-notebook poetry that Jim Morrison’s lyrics inspired.” While plenty of critics agree with him (including writers on our staff), most will contend that’s quite an overstated opinion. Or, maybe not.
Truth be told, The Doors have always been a polarizing band, and their success to destruction ratio was about 1:3. They burned bridges at Los Angeles’s Whiskey a Go Go, thanks to their 12-minute Oedipal epic, “The End”; they were banned from The Ed Sullivan Show; they pissed off The Kinks with “Hello, I Love You”; they lost the critics with 1969′s The Soft Parade; they ran into a gamut of legal problems, including Morrison’s notorious Miami arrest in 1969; and, to top it off, they were sensationalized in a biopic from Oliver Stone.
That last part isn’t their fault – especially since the band’s surviving members have all since written it off – but it’s still left quite an indentation on the Los Angeles quartet. Morrison, the late poet and frontman, is forever immortalized as a reckless, abusive alcoholic who stumbled around the west in leather pants, muttering inconsistencies about love, death, and… Indians. Who knows how much of that is true, and does it really matter? It’s a part of his legend. Besides, there are countless anecdotes in Danny Sugerman and Jerry Hopkins’ essential Morrison biography, No One Here Gets Out Alive, that support half of the stories portrayed in Stone’s film; in fact, they expand on them in some cases.
Still, Berman’s assessment burns. If the music’s sophomoric and Morrison’s remembered as “a drunken buffoon,” to borrow from Philip Seymour Hoffman’s portrayal of Creem Magazine‘s Lester Bangs via Cameron Crowe’s Almost Famous, then what’s left to mine here? Well, how about their influence? Iggy Pop loved them, so did Ian Curtis, and you could maybe add Jarvis Cocker to that list, but that might be a stretch. Love him or hate him, there’s no denying Morrison’s impact, which Berman addresses in that very same review, and there’s no denying that reckless power they trademarked. However, isn’t reckless the sort of thing a high school student strives for? Perhaps there is truth to Berman’s claim.
Whatever the case, in light of their 40th anniversary and the recent reissue of L.A. Woman, the group’s last album with Morrison, we found a reason to revisit the group. This time, we decided to focus a little harder, because if there’s anything we learned from Kids in the Hall, it’s that “…if you want to be a Doors fan, you can’t just buy any album. It’s scientific.”
-Michael Roffman
President/Editor-in-Chief
The Doors (1967)
“Horse Latitudes”: 34.07°N 118.39°W – or, Los Angeles, CA – Open it up on Sunset Boulevard, hit some bars, find an estranged lover or two, and end the night in some abandoned mansion. Leave your mother out of this.
Number of songs including incest: 1
Number of songs that could title porn films: 7, “Break On Through (To the Other Side)”, “Soul Kitchen”, “Twentieth Century Fox”, “Light My Fire”, “Back Door Man”, “End of the Night”, “Take It As It Comes”
Okay, it actually is a porn film: “Back Door Man”
“Where’s your will to be weird?”: Ray Manzarek’s organ work for “Alabama Song”. It could easily soundtrack Tobe Hooper’s 1981 clowncore film, The Funhouse.
Shortest song: “I Looked at You” (2:22)
Longest song: “The End”(11:41)
Val Kilmer did it better: “The End” – Let’s be honest, there’s no footage of the group’s last Whiskey A Go Go gig, and Kilmer’s performance of the track – especially that “fuck you all night, yeaaaaaah” part – trumps any recording to date. Sorry, Jim.
Strange Days (1967)
“Horse Latitudes”: 34.08°N 117.41°W – or, Joshua Tree, CA – Wait ’til it’s scorching hot, drink very little, skip track six, eat adventurously (try a lizard, perhaps), wander into a cave, and write on the walls with your imagination. On your way back into town, return to track six.
Number of songs covered by Aerosmith for the soundtrack to Air America (1990): 1, “Love Me Two Times”
It’s about vampires, right?: Although Echo & the Bunnymen’s cover of “People Are Strange” is forever tied to vampires, thanks to its inclusion in Joel Schumacher’s one of three good films, The Lost Boys, the song’s about alienation and being an outcast. Okay, so it’s about vampires.
Hey, remember that film with Ralph Fiennes?: No.
“Where’s your will to be weird?”: “Horse Latitudes”, essentially a sneak preview of Morrison’s 1978 spoken-word album, An American Prayer. When you’re on a boat with your uncle this summer, remember to tell him that “true sailing is dead.”
Shortest song: “Horse Latitudes” (1:35)
Longest song: “When the Music’s Over”(10:59)
Val Kilmer did it better: “Moonlight Drive” – Kilmer sings to Kyle MacLachlan’s Ray Manzarek on Venice Beach while the sun burns away into the horizon over surfers and bikini-clad girls. MacLachlan tells Kilmer, “That was fuckin’ beautiful, man.” No argument there.
Waiting for the Sun (1968)
“Horse Latitudes”: 36.15°N 112.30°W – or, Arizona’s Grand Canyon National Park – Keep replaying track one in the car (despite any traffic, weather conditions, or engine distractions), then let it rip as you hike down to the Colorado River, where you’ll rob a canoe, go bobbing for fish, and then do peyote with a random Indian woman named Irma who turns out to be a signpost that reads, “Watch Out For Falling Rocks”. Carry on.
Number of songs sampled by Jay-Z: 1, “Five to One” for The Blueprint‘s “Takeover”. You can thank Yeezy for that one.
Six Degrees of Robby Krieger: As Wikipedia points out, “The guitar solo on Pearl Jam’s “Alive” was based on Ace Frehley’s guitar solo on the Kiss song “She”, which was in turn based on Robby Krieger’s solo in “Five to One”.” If anyone can link this to Kevin Bacon, they win a $100 gift certificate to Party City.
Okay, so that’s creepy: When Morrison screams, “Dead president’s corpse in the driver’s car/The engine runs on glue and tar,” on the equally chilling “Not to Touch the Earth”, you’re shivering. Now, try and imagine how ol’ Jackie felt.
“Where’s your will to be weird?”: That military interlude in the middle of “The Unknown Soldier”. On stage, it was an excellent opportunity to showcase Morrison’s theatrical side. On record, it’s a reminder to skip to the next track, even if it makes you feel unpatriotic.
Shortest song: “Wintertime Love” (1:53)
Longest song: “Five to One”(4:25)
Val Kilmer did it better: He doesn’t. Morrison will always shine here all the way through.
The Soft Parade (1969)
“Horse Latitudes”: 36.17°N 115.13°W – or, Las Vegas, NV – Forget gambling, skip the strip clubs, and don’t buy tickets to any shows. You are the show. Take your ass to the Bellagio and start singing each song here – and loud. Though, be careful who you ask for “soft asylum.” Could get rough.
Number of songs pre-written for The Bee Gees: 1, “The Soft Parade” – John Densmore’s scatterbrained percussion has Barry, Robin and Maurice Gibb written all over it.
The best cover of “Five to One”: “Wild Child” – Okay, so it’s not the same song, but the stomping Godzilla-like rhythm section and the song’s vocal melody echo the greatest track off of Strange Days. Morrison’s snarl on “wild chi-ld” even mimics how he screams “five to one.” Maybe they forgot.
Scrapped theme song for Dallas: “Tell All the People” – It’s all in the lyrics: “Can’t you see me growing, get your guns”; “Gonna bury all our troubles in the sand”: “Follow me across the sea/Where milky babies seem to be.” Morrison hated the song, but J.R. would have loved it. Well, maybe not.
“Where’s your will to be weird?”: When the 1885 version of ZZ Top – see: Back to the Future Part III – seemingly chimes in throughout “Runnin’ Blue”.
Shortest song: “Runnin’ Blue” (2:26)
Longest song: “The Soft Parade”(8:35)
Val Kilmer did it better: “Touch Me” – Nothing beats a drunken Kilmer, flubbing the recording sessions and ad-libbing the lyrics, specifically the iconic chorus. Who can listen to it now and not think: “C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon now suck me, babe. Can’t you see I need some fuckin’ head…” Thanks, Val.
Morrison Hotel (1970)
“Horse Latitudes”: 30.27°N 97.74°W – or, Austin, TX – Sell your car, cash out your ATM, head to Sixth and Red River St., slowly make your way into every bar, and then pass out somewhere on campus by week’s end. Wake up and find your car as you re-listen to “Waiting for the Sun” for the 70th time. See how long it takes you to remember you sold it.
Number of times a sloppy drunk has karaoked to “Roadhouse Blues”: Infinite
Number of times CoS’ Editor-in-Chief has karaoked to “Roadhouse Blues”: See above.
Best Creedence Clearwater Revival song NOT sung by John Fogerty: “Land Ho!”
Most confusing track simply because of its title: “Waiting for the Sun.” WTF? Don’t they have an album called that?
Van Halen, take note: “Indian Summer” – Morrison’s “high school poetry” has never sounded better. An outtake from the group’s debut album, this one dates back to 1966, and its early innocence shows. It sticks out slightly here, but it’s one of the most intimate songs from the band. Eddie, if you’re gonna dig into the vaults, here’s an example of “doing it right.”
“Where’s your will to be weird?”: The way Morrison can take a tight, politically-charged single and still manage to throw in a random spoken word interlude – this time, his classic tale of “Indians scattered on dawn’s highway bleeding.” CLASSIC MORRISON.
Shortest song: ”Blue Sunday” (2:13)
Longest song: ”Maggie M’Gill” (4:23)
Val Kilmer did it better: Morrison trumps again.
L.A. Woman (1971)
“Horse Latitudes”: 34.07°N 118.39°W – or, Los Angeles, CA – Return to Sunset Boulevard, revisit some bars, reconnect with that estranged lover from before, burn down the abandoned mansion, and hit the road fast. Never look behind, never call your mother.
Jim’s Mick Jagger moment: “The Changeling” – Starting off with the grunt and the random mumbling, you can’t help but imagine him aping Jagger’s moves. In hindsight, he was hardly in any condition to do that.
Who’s that on the cover?: Jim James? James Brolin? The guy on the sign for South Florida’s chain restaurant, Flanagan’s? Oh, it’s still Jim.
Unnecessary YouTube search: Remember when Creed covered “Riders on the Storm”?
Dude, I’m not crying: “Hyacinth House” – When Morrison sings, “I need a brand new friend who doesn’t bother me,” you sort of wish someone would have found him one. Then you realize the irony of that statement. Fuck. Why did you throw the Jack of Hearts away, Jim?
“Where’s your will to be weird?”: Pretty much the entirety of “L’America”. Way to get esoteric on us again.
Shortest song: “Hyacinth House” (2:13)
Longest song: “L.A. Woman” (7:49)
Val Kilmer did it better: “L.A. Woman” – Given that this hit single arrived after The Doors had ceased touring, we never really got the chance to see Morrison belt this one out. In fact, they only performed it once – at their second to last gig. Seeing Kilmer in the recording booth, laying down the vocals alongside all of the other members one last time, it’s a bittersweet moment. They look happy, they look proud, and they look alive. Sort of a nice note to end on.
