If you’re anything like me, you’re inundated with holiday sweater parties for the next month. (Count your lucky Star of Bethlehem if you’re saved from such ho-ho-horrors.) Luckily, I could wear the Wu-Tang sweater to Mike and Ellie’s Winter Wonderland and the Slayer sweater to David’s Holiday Hoedown.
But what about to Jaime’s Christmas Jam-boree (a combination holiday sweater and artisanal jam party)? Why, I can be the most rockin’ attendee thanks to the brand-new Queens of the Stone Age holiday sweater.
Eschewing the traditional red and green of most holiday sweaters, QOTSA’s yuletide offering is burgundy and white. And rather than depicting a fat Santa Claus petting polar bears or joyous elves at work on toy trains and PS4s, there are two pairs of reindeer engaged in some, um, “festive celebrations.” The sweater runs for $34.99, and you can snag your very own right here. It’s also available as a black t-shirt in case you’d like to unwrap your perversions after the party’s warmed up a bit.
If “mid-coitus reindeer family portrait” is still too life-affirming, the band is also offering a separate Christmas t-shirt. Here, the “iconic” sperm logo from Songs for the Deaf is given a little holiday spin with the addition of a teeny tiny Santa hat. Because, hey, tis the season, amirite?! Get your very own shirt right here for $19.99.
If you’re already sick of Xmas, relive a little Halloween spookiness with the video for the …Like Clockwork standout “The Vampyre of Time and Memory”.