Entertainment News
The No. 1 Source For Breaking Music, Film, and TV Headlines

It gets worse: CBGB branded baby onesies and umbrellas coming soon

on December 28, 2015, 4:40pm

Just when you thought they couldn’t piss any harder on the grave of legendary venue CBGB than by opening a restaurant in Newark Airport, of all places, it gets worse. POLITICO’s deputy media editor Alex Weprin got his hands on copyright filings that reveal the new ways the holding company in charge of the CBGB name and logo plan to further sully its reputation.

The company has filed for trademark protection on the production of cellphone cases, T-shirts, bags, and beanies. And because what punk wants to get their nifty H&M denim jacket damp, they’re making CBGB branded umbrellas. They’ve also got you punk rock parents all set, with onseies for “infants and toddlers, and baby bibs not of paper” also in the works.

Yes, now you too can be decked out in all the surely-overpriced logo vomit of a once iconic source of underground grit and beautiful grime while sitting at CBGB L.A.B. (lounge and bar) while you order from iPads stuck right in the middle of your table. Nothing says counter culture like touching a screen instead of interacting with any humans while you chow down on a wedge salad for $11.50, $15.05 if you want chicken.

On the plus side, the trademark application reveals the name of the company causing all this ickiness: 315 Bowery Holdings, LLC (the address where CBGB once proudly stood). Direct your hate mail accordingly. Find pictures of the newly opened restaurant and the trademark filing below.