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Gilmore Girls’ Top 20 Episodes

on November 23, 2016, 2:15pm
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Top Episodes is a new feature in which we handpick the definitive best episodes of a groundbreaking, beloved, or otherwise awesome television series. This time, Gilmore Guy Matt Melis and Gilmore Girl Allison Shoemaker take a Hartford shuttle back to a little town called Stars Hollow.

Anytime a guy reveals that he’s a Gilmore Girls fan, it almost comes across as confessional. And even if he openly admits to being a Gilmore Guy, he invariably prefaces this admission by explaining that his wife, girlfriend, or some other woman in his life turned him onto the show. It’s 2016, fellas. Time to own it like you broke it at Kim’s Antiques. Even if a lady dragged you kicking and screaming to Stars Hollow, nobody made you stick around, buy those DVD box sets, or post those impressive “How Well Do You Know Your Gilmore Girls?” quiz results on your Facebook wall. Again, it’s 2016. We appreciate your business.

And what’s there to be ashamed about, anyway? The show has it all: unforgettable characters, rapid-fire dialogue, a junkie-like obsession with pop culture, Shakespearean scheming blended with farcical irreverence, and grudges so fierce that the show’s famous Friday night dinners often resemble an evening in the Thunderdome. For me, I was first drawn in by the quaintest (and most insane) small town on earth, Stars Hollow. Having grown up watching sitcoms like Green Acres and The Vicar of Dibley, I readily latched on to the idea of dropping relatively sane people into a town-shaped loony bin. And it’s within these town limits that I learned essential facts like Al’s Pancake World serves just about everything but pancakes; enough minimum-wage jobs can actually make a guy independently wealthy; and Miss Patty, several husbands ago, once danced in a cage with Tito Puente. Twirl, girls!

In a time when any property the public vaguely remembers gets rebooted or remade, Netflix’s upcoming Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life mini-series feels like anything but a cash grab. We diehards genuinely can’t wait to see what’s become of our many beloved characters nearly a decade later. Are Zack and Lane a husband-wife yacht rock duo living in Brooklyn, is Paris Geller eyeing a run at the White House down the road, and if we stop by the Dragonfly Inn, will we still find Michel turning up his nose at guests and Sookie erasing the single-digit number on the sign in the kitchen that reads “This Many Days Since an Accident”? And then there are the really big questions that have been clawing at us like Cat Kirk: How will Emily Gilmore carry on without Richard (played by the late Edward Herrmann), will Luke and Lorelai still be “all in,” and where has Rory landed and with whom (#TeamDean, #TeamJess, #TeamLogan or #TeamRoryDontNeedNoMan)? For some of us, this is like the countdown to the kickoff on Super Bowl Sunday. Friday can’t come soon enough.

The other reason fans want to revisit Stars Hollow one more time is for the closure afforded by a proper conclusion. Series creator Amy Sherman-Palladino infamously didn’t get to take part in Gilmore Girl’s final season (more on that to come), which means she didn’t get to end the show as she always had planned. In fact, Lauren Graham has explained that none of the cast or crew knew the series had ended until a couple weeks after they shot the Season 7 finale. Now we’ll finally get to see these characters finish their stories the way Sherman-Palladino had originally intended. She’s claimed that the show was always supposed to end on four specific words. What are those four words exactly? Speculate away — probably something along the lines of “I love you, <insert name>.” By Friday morning, we should all know. And hell, even if the four-word ending falls through, I’d settle for Babette yelling: “You gotta give it a little something, honey!”

Damn, it feels good to be a Gilmore Guy.

–Matt Melis
Editorial Director

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20. A Deep-Fried Korean Thanksgiving

Season: 03

Episode #: 09

Original Air Date: Nov. 26, 2002

When the show famed for fitting two hours of dialogue into one hour of television took a crack at Thanksgiving, they did the only sensible thing: they crammed four Thanksgiving dinners into one episode. “A Deep-Fried Korean Thanksgiving” arrives on the heels of the Dean-Rory breakup, in the throes of another Emily and Richard kerfuffle, and well before Luke and Lorelai got around to the “will” part of the will-they-or-won’t-they. Yet for all the drama, this is a mostly joyful outing. The race between dinners — skipping the rolls, of course — gives nearly every character a moment to shine, right on down to Babette and Morey. There’s still plenty of that delicious Rory-Lorelai banter, but this episode belongs to the ensemble: Lane’s first kiss! Drunk Sookie watching Jackson deep-fry everything she owns! Cat Kirk! Not even another Dean and Jess confrontation can take the shine off this apple. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “What is the oil for?” “For pouring on Visigoths.” “Lorelai.” “When else am I gonna get to use my Visigoth material?” –Lorelai Gilmore, in an exchange with Rory and Sookie

Gilmost Meal: Leftover rolls from Luke’s, “a little something for the walk home.”

Only in Stars Hollow: Kirk’s cat, Cat Kirk, attempts to garrote his owner with a cute ball of yarn, even without opposable thumbs. “He’s beyond them!”

Lane’s Mix: “The Man Who Sold the World” by David Bowie

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19. The Big One

Season: 03

Episode #: 16

Original Air Date: Feb. 25, 2003

When it comes to the non-Gilmore girls of Gilmore Girls, only three ever gave Emily, Lorelai, and Rory a run for their money: Lane, Paris, and Sookie. The latter two take center stage in “The Big One”, each hitting a major life milestone that sends ripples they don’t expect. In Sookie’s case, her first pregnancy means joy for her and an episode-long anxiety attack for Jackson, who doesn’t stop to kiss his wife before busting out the calculator, calling a contractor, and throwing out all of Sookie’s potentially baby-killing cooking utensils. Still, Sookie’s trials don’t hold a candle to Paris’. This is Liza Weil’s finest hour on the series, as the character the Palladinos created for her melts down in funny but heartbreaking fashion. Her speech at the Chilton bicentennial may be the single most cringeworthy moment on a series full of them, and when Rory comforts her afterward, whose heart doesn’t break for this lonely, brilliant, wonderful nightmare of a girl? –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “I mean, can anyone here believe that I’m not going to Harvard? I can’t. I’m not going to Harvard. I am not going to Harvard. I had sex, but I’m not going to Harvard! And I have to tell you that if you asked me which of those two events I thought would be the least likely to happen, it would not be the not going to Harvard. I’m being punished. I had sex, so now I don’t get to go to Harvard. She’s never had sex. She’ll probably go to Harvard. She’s a shoe-in. Pack your chastity belt, Gilmore — you’re going to Harvard!” –Paris Geller

Gilmost Meal: A Kit-Kat bar, in lieu of pregnant Sookie’s sewery dishes.

Only in Stars Hollow: The mail carrier (Kirk, of course) decides organizing the mail beforehand is beneath him, leading to a tussle on the floor of Doose’s market.

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18. Written in the Stars

Season: 05

Episode #: 03

Original Air Date: Oct. 5, 2004

There’s no shortage of romantic gestures in this series, from Dean building Rory a car (his finest hour) to a thousand yellow daisies (still to come on this list). Still, with one exception, this might be the most swoon-inducing moment of them all. Gilmore Girls belongs to Lorelai and Rory, but the central romance really kicks off right here. The horoscope Luke kept for eight years makes for a pretty good indicator of what this means to him. Lorelai’s stunned silence, a rare occurrence, similarly spoke volumes. The greatest indicator of what this relationship meant to the show, however, comes in the form of that jaw-dropping town meeting. Taylor was at his most absurd, but he was also speaking for fans: please, please don’t screw this up.

Oh, and Rory meets Logan. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “She asked me my birthday. I wouldn’t tell her, she wouldn’t stop talking, finally I gave in. I told her my birthday. She went and got the newspaper, opened it up to the horoscopes page, wrote something down, tore it out, handed it to me. So I was looking at this piece of paper in my hand, and under Scorpio, she had written, ‘You will meet an annoying woman. Give her coffee, and she’ll go away.’ So I gave her coffee.” –Luke Danes

Gilmost Meal: The coffee Lorelai attempts to obtain sans pants.

Only in Stars Hollow: Town selectman Taylor Doose presents charts tracing the economic impact of a breakup on the town.

Lane’s Mix: “Lily-A-Passion” by Grant Lee Phillips (aka The Town Troubadour)

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17. I Get a Sidekick Out of You

Season: 06

Episode #: 19

Original Air Date: Apr. 18, 2006

Amy Sherman-Palladino filled the world of Gilmore Girls with strong, opinionated women — ladies who won’t budge or back down when they know they are in the right. Of course, we all know that Lorelai turned down a comfortable future in order to carve out her own quirky life in Stars Hollow, complete with monkey lamp. But she’s far from the only “bold broad” on the show who insists on having it her way. Emily Gilmore, Paris Geller, and Mrs. Kim are all unstoppable forces of nature who rule their respective spheres with dictatorial conviction. And that’s what makes an episode like “I Get a Sidekick Out of You”, or any of the episodes in which Richard’s mother (the original Lorelai) drops in on Emily, so wickedly delightful. Sure, it’s fun to see Lane and Zack tie the knot, but the real joy stems from seeing Mrs. Kim forced to assume the role of obedient daughter, bending over backwards (two weddings!) and forwards (the ritual of 108 bows!) to please an unreasonable, fastidious parent. But it’s not just a case of the wedding tables turning on a tyrant; throughout the series, Sherman-Palladino reveals the layers beneath all these characters, showing us that there’s more to anyone than what we see on the surface. In this case, we learn that devout Mrs. Kim, in her own hymn-singing, Tofurky-cooking way, actually passed the rebel gene down to her punk rock-worshiping drummer daughter. Now, if only we can find out what happened to Mr. Kim. Uh, oh. Gotta run. Why? 58 seats, 62 Koreans. Go! –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “Lorelai Gilmore: disappointing mothers since 1968.” –Lorelai Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Naughty-shaped bachelorette party cookies that expanded to obscene sizes when baked.

Only in Stars Hollow: Kirk starts a male bartender service called Yummy Bartenders to bring “truly yummy bartenders to the lonely women of Stars Hollow … we’re talking mouthwatering, tasty morsels of manhood.”

Lane’s Mix: “Heart of Glass” by Blondie

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16. Women of Questionable Morals

Season: 05

Episode #: 11

Original Air Date: Jan. 25, 2005

While there might be a heated debate over #TeamJess, #TeamDean, or #TeamLogan, I think it’s safe to say that any actual or honorary resident of Stars Hollow (save for maybe Taylor Doose, who fears that a Luke/Lorelai breakup would cast the local economy into a Great Depression-like spiral) proudly flies the #TeamLuke colors. This episode shows why. Lorelai has always had a magical relationship with snow, which seems to always bring good tidings into her life. However, when this year’s first snowfall proves to be a cold, frozen kick in the ass, Luke steps in to reconcile the two. When she comes home from one of the lousiest days ever — complete with being offered the part of Town Whore in a Revolutionary War reenactment — she finds Luke waiting with an ice rink set up in her front yard. Who but Luke Danes, grumpy crank that he is, would go out of his way like that to cheer her up? It’s not a landmark episode in any way, despite seeing Kirk in colonial drag, but it’s such a sweet gesture that tells us all we need to know about who really deserves to be with Lorelai. Hint, it ain’t Digger Stiles. –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “If I run into any moderately weighted whores in my travels, I’ll let you know.” –Luke Danes

Gilmost Meal: Rum, milk, cookies, and hangover pancakes.

Only in Stars Hollow: The town Revolutionary War reenactment committee sets out to reenact the time a colonial prostitute from Stars Hollow changed the outcome of the American Revolution, resulting in understudy Kirk seducing a British general (Taylor) and leading him by hand to his warm boudoir. Glad the local media turned out in droves.

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15. Forgiveness and Stuff

Season: 01

Episode #: 10

Original Air Date: Dec. 21, 2001

Hospitals ask us to check our emotional baggage at the door, and the Gilmore luggage has more miles on it than most. By the time Richard ends up in the ER after collapsing at Christmas dinner — one Lorelai was uninvited to — in the 10th episode of the series, we already know the root causes of the tension between Lorelai and her parents. However, here we see the gravity of the situation poke holes in the armor each character wears to conceal the emotional wounds caused by so many years of compounded pain and disappointment. Fear scrapes away at Emily’s acerbic, dutiful, stubborn veneer to reveal a wife, like any other, terrified of losing her husband. In Lorelai, we see an independent woman, one who has always been at odds with her father, become daddy’s little girl again, frightened, aware of how she disappointed him, and unable to tell him she loves him. Once she finally works up the nerve to go into his hospital room, they share a tearful look at each other, neither one able to muster any words before being interrupted by Richard’s doctor. It’s a moment that reveals both what’s in the hearts of father and daughter and how very far they still have left to go to put their painful past behind them. –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “Richard Gilmore, there may be many things happening in this hospital tonight, but your dying is not one of them. No, I did not sign on to your dying, and it is not going to happen, not tonight, not for a very long time. In fact, I demand to go first. Do I make myself clear?” “Yes, Emily. You may go first.” –Emily and Richard Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Apple tarts, salad and Ranch dressing in a bag, and vending machine chicken soup and Pez — a veritable Gilmore cornucopia of plenty

Only in Stars Hollow: The Christmas nativity pageant has a before-Mary (a local pregnant woman) and an after-Mary. Miss Patty worries that the before-Mary will become an after-Mary before the opening curtain.

Lane’s Mix: “Christmas Wrapping” by The Waitresses

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14. We’ve Got Magic To Do

Season: 06

Episode #: 05

Original Air Date: Oct. 11, 2005

While it certainly has it moments (“Why did you drop out of Yale?!”), the arc that tracks the estrangement of Rory and Lorelai doesn’t exactly represent the best that Gilmore Girls has to offer. Still, even the weakest stretches of this series have high-water marks, and “We’ve Got Magic to Do” is such an episode. There’s no shortage of Stars Hollow whimsy, thanks to Miss Patty’s recital, but the real story here is Richard and Emily learning the truth about the way the Huntzbergers treated Rory. It’s not all satisfying, as both grandparents have to reckon with the ways in which they’ve failed their granddaughter, but there’s no finer Emily Gilmore moment than her dressing-down of the woman who decided Rory wasn’t good enough. Add in Rory’s triumph and Paris’ stint as a member of the proletariat, and you’ve got episodic gold. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “Now, let’s talk about your money. You were a two-bit gold digger fresh off the bus from Hicksville when you met Mitchum at whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum decide to choose you to marry amongst the pack of women he was bedding at the time, I’ll never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. He’s still a playboy, you know? Well, of course you know. That would explain why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every other month. But that’s your cross to bear. But these are ugly realities. No one needs to talk about them. Those kids are staying together for as long as they like. You won’t stop them. Now, enjoy the event.” –Emily Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: The D.A.R. dinner, sans salmon puffs.

Only in Stars Hollow: Kirk’s The Journey of Man get an encore performance 20 years later.

Lane’s Mix: “Koyaanisqatsi” by Philip Glass

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13. Nick and Nora/Sid and Nancy

Season: 02

Episode #: 05

Original Air Date: Oct. 30, 2001

Amy Sherman-Palladino has weighed in on the men in Rory’s life, saying that she believes each of them brought something that Rory needed at a particular point in her development. Well, let’s consider Jess Mariano her obligatory bad boy, then. When Jess’ mother and Luke’s sister, Liz, turns to her brother for help with her wayward James Dean-meets-Chachi son, Jess, a city kid, gets shipped off against his will to the quaintest town on earth, Stars Hollow. He’s everything the town is not and, more importantly, everything the gentle, dependable (and let’s face it, whiny and insecure) boyfriend Dean is not. And his hoodlum gaze quickly settles on shy, nose-in-a-book Rory Gilmore. Though only around for about a quarter of the series, Jess quickly became one of the show’s most compelling characters, his evolution from fuck-the-world troubled teen to fuck-the-world making-his-own-way adult a process that shook up Stars Hollow and brought out a different side of Rory. Just how volatile could Jess be? This episode starts with Uncle Luke buying Frosted Flakes and blowing up an air mattress and ends with him shoving Jess into a pond out of sheer frustration. God, did he look yummy soaking wet, though. Wait, what? –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “He’s adjusting. He just got here. He probably just went out and realized that there are 12 stores in this town devoted entirely to peddling porcelain unicorns. I’ve lived in this town my entire life, and I still can’t believe it.” –Luke Danes

Gilmost Meal: Frosted Flakes and cigarettes or pot roast, grilled cheese, chicken wings, mashed potatoes, and four different types of salad. Either’ll kill you.

Only in Stars Hollow: The public high school says the Pledge of Allegiance in six different languages, two of which Jess has never heard of before.

Lane’s Mix: “This Is Hell” by Elvis Costello

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12. Last Week Fights, This Week Tights

Season: 04

Episode #: 21

Original Air Date: May 11, 2004

There’s more to this episode than the revelation that “Luke can waltz.” In one hour, writer Daniel Palladino manages to pack in a number of significant beginnings and endings, from Lorelai helping to bridge the separation between Lane and Mrs. Kim to the marriage of Liz and T.J. While Lorelai’s slow-burning realization of Luke’s intentions looms large, the most affecting of these turning-point storylines belongs to Jess (and Milo Ventimiglia). After some time away, some tough love from Luke, and a brief stint with a self-help book, Jess attempts to do right by the people he loves. With his mother and (especially) with Luke, it’s lovely, honest, and effective. Not so with Rory, who he asks to leave her life behind and run away with him. Yes, Luke can waltz, but Jess has put in the work, too — and it doesn’t work out as planned. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “It involves the “J” word. “Oh, not more about Jesus. I’m sick of him and Mel Gibson.” –Lorelai and Rory Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Turkey legs, clearly.

Only in Stars Hollow: The minister for the wedding is the guy who once set up an illegal farmer’s market outside Doose’s market, was also a troubadour, and uses those troubadour skills to sing a song about how love is the greatest toy around.

Lane’s Mix: “In a Big Country” by Big Country

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11. Love, Daisies and Troubadours

Season: 01

Episode #: 21

Original Air Date: May 10, 2001

Gilmore Girls begins with the two Lorelais embarking on new and equally awkward phases in their romantic lives. While Rory is just beginning to work up the nerve to talk to boys about things like “really round cakes” and impenetrable Russian novelists, Lorelai seems to be seriously dipping her toe back into the dating pool for the first time since Christopher, Rory’s father. As Dean Forester, Sherman-Palladino’s idea of a perfect first boyfriend, and Max Medina, Rory’s English teacher, enter their lives, for the first time the Gilmore girls are suddenly not alone. Boys are knocking at windows, men are falling asleep on couches, and Lorelai and Rory are constantly trying to figure out how to make their relationships work and how much of their romantic lives to share with each other. All of it comes to a head by the end of the season, where we see Max propose with 1,000 yellow daisies and Rory finally utter those magical words (“I love you, you idiot”) when Dean drives his pickup truck to Chilton. This could’ve meant happily ever after, but we all know Max and Dean will only be the first of many men to try and woo a Gilmore. And what about Lorelai’s Luke hallucination at the beginning of this episode? Oh, it’s only just begun. –Matt Melis 

Gilmost Line: “Obviously, he’s met one of those Thursday afternoon girls.” “What’s a Thursday afternoon girl?” “They’re those slutty girls that get guys to switch their Thursday afternoons with another checkout guy, so they can go do slutty Thursday afternoon things.” –Rory Gilmore and Lane Kim

Gilmost Meal: Diapers for the little ones, dorsal fins and cooga munga, and farfignugen snooden doogen (code for burgers, fries, and sodas smuggled into a town meeting)

Only in Stars Hollow: There’s no Battle of the Bands, but there’s a heated duel between Grant Lee Phillips and David Gruber Allen for the post of Town Troubadour.

Lane’s Mix: “One Line” by PJ Harvey

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10. Those Are Strings, Pinocchio

Season: 03

Episode #: 22

Original Air Date: May 20, 2003

Ugly-crying through the end of Gilmore Girls episodes is a time-honored tradition, but other than the series finale, no single outing is more likely to put one on the verge of blubbering than this, Rory’s graduation from Chilton. Her decision to strike another financial bargain with her grandparents does more than ensure four more seasons of Friday Night Dinners — it’s a deal that ensures Lorelai and Sookie get the Dragonfly, a sacrifice for her mother that only increases in potency when you hear the beautiful speech she delivers as valedictorian: “I don’t know if she ever realized,” she tells the crowd, “the person I most wanted to be was her.” It’s a beautiful way to mark a rite of passage and tearfully sends both Rory and Lorelai into the next chapter of their lives. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “Crying a little, but not blubbering. That’s what we meant when we said no crying. No blubbering.” –Sookie St. James

Gilmost Meal: This might be the only episode of the series where Rory and Lorelai don’t eat something.

Only in Stars Hollow: Kirk proposes releasing a pack of wolves to handle the deer problem. Of course, then you have to deal with your wolf problem.

Lane’s Mix: “Peace Train” by Cat Stevens

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09. The Lorelais’ First Day at Chilton

Season: 01

Episode #: 02

Original Air Date: Oct. 12, 2000

Chilton may be stuffy, over-competitive, and responsible for quashing many a school girl fantasy (even Paris has said that you don’t fall in love with someone who makes you want to crap your pants), but it’s also where the Gilmore Girls story begins in so many ways. Not only does it mark Rory’s first real push towards the Ivy League, but it also finds Lorelai turning to her parents for help, something she hasn’t done since moving to Stars Hollow. With Richard and Emily agreeing to pay for Chilton’s hefty tuition in exchange for Friday night dinners, so begins the tango between them and Lorelai that lasts well after Rory has left Chilton, plaid skirts, and saddle shoes behind. The entire premise of the show goes back to Lorelai needing to strike out on her own, away from her parents’ sphere of wealth and privilege, in order to arrive at someplace that’s right for her. Part of the irony, though, is that her dreams for Rory keep pushing her back towards that world of debutante balls, cotillions, and dinners served promptly at seven after martinis, that world she once so desperately fled. It’s that tug-of-war, the Gilmores grasping one arm and her Stars Hollow life clutching the other, that makes her journey so compelling, hilarious, and complicated. But, hey, love those cowgirl boots. –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “I was in the German Club for a while. But there were only three of us, and then two left for the French Club after seeing Schindler’s List.” –Rory Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Pizza by the slice and coffee.

Only at Chilton: At Chilton, students recite the school song upon demand, in Latin for extra credit; get called “Mary” for not looking like a slut; and make counseling appointments with Mr. Winters, who handles everything but bulimia and pregnancy. For that, they go to the nurse or Coach Reubens.

Lane’s Mix: “I’m the Man Who Murdered Love” by XTC

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08. Partings

Season: 06

Episode #: 22

Original Air Date: May 9, 2006

Modern audiences are sophisticated. We’ve just seen so much over the years. So, as much as we hoped Luke and Lorelai were together for good, experience grudgingly suggested that Lorelai’s impromptu proposal to Luke while under the duress of Rory stealing a yacht, dropping out of Yale, and moving in with Richard and Emily probably wasn’t the Porky Pig “that’s all folks” moment. And yet, none of us were ready for the heartbreaking thud that came outside Luke’s Diner when Luke couldn’t answer Lorelai’s ultimatum. A lot happens in this episode: musicians flood the town square hoping to be discovered, Rory gets a future Yale astronomy building named after her, and Logan ships off to England, but just none of that really seems to matter. We see Lorelai walk away in tears, and every last one of us screams, at least internally, “Go after her, you idiot!” But Luke doesn’t. It’s so heart-wrenching that I don’t even think it registered until next season that Lorelai woke up the next morning in Christopher’s bed. If ever an audience would’ve accepted an “it was all a dream” cop-out, it would’ve been here. Oh, Luke! –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “The big time? I made 700 bucks and got booed, and I never even met Neil Young. Heart of gold, my ass.” –-Grant, the Town Troubadour

Gilmost Meal: Sandwiches, sodas, and tiramisu in the town square with the troubadours or chips and a pint at Logan’s London-themed going-away party.

Only in Hartford: Richard and Emily unveil a mock-up of the Rory Gilmore Astronomy Building, coming soon to Yale’s campus, with lettering large enough to be seen from space.

Lane’s Mix: “What a Waste” by Sonic Youth

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07. I Can’t Get Started

Season: 02

Episode #: 22

Original Air Date: May 21, 2002

It would happen this way when Lane got married, too: Sookie’s wedding ended up being more about the Gilmores than about the lady in the white dress. Sookie has her moment, of course, and Melissa McCarthy has one of her best scenes in the series when Lorelai finds her fixing her cake in the middle of the night. Still, the main event here is the brief reunion of Lorelai and Christopher, one which abruptly ends when the latter is given the chance to do right by his unexpectedly pregnant girlfriend. As Sookie’s bizarre processional song choice, “I Can’t Get Started”, plays, Lauren Graham’s face registers so much, yet remains oddly blank. It’s one of her best moments in a series full of them and perhaps the point where audiences turned on the charming Mr. Hayden for good. It’s a heartbreak years in the making, captured in an instant. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “In fact, if you put oy and poodle together in the same sentence, you’d have a great new catchphrase, you know? Like, oy with the poodles already. So from now on, when the perfect circumstances arise, we will use our favorite new catchphrase.” “Oy with the poodles already.” –Lorelai and Rory Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Pink frosting out of a bowl at 1 a.m. while Sookie’s in her wedding dress.

Only in Stars Hollow: Miss Patty and Babette start busting out the show tunes at someone else’s wedding before they’ve had even a single cocktail.

Lane’s Mix: “I Can’t Get Started” by Ella Fitzgerald

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06. Bon Voyage

Season: 07

Episode: 22

Original Air Date: May 15, 2007

It’s no secret that Season 7 was a bit of a mess. Without Amy Sherman-Palladino at the helm, the series took some odd and incredibly unsatisfying detours, as if the creative team knew where they wanted to go but had zero idea how to get there. (Case in point: Christopher and Lorelai getting married in Paris on a whim. Pardon?) One thing they got right, however, was the season’s conclusion, “Bon Voyage”, which also turned out to be the show’s final episode. We all knew Luke and Lorelai needed to get back together, and thankfully, despite all the convoluted story boarding of Season 7, the writers simply let the two characters find each other naturally. When a job offer to cover the first Obama campaign threatens to whisk Rory away before her scheduled goodbye party, Luke secretly pulls the entire town together to make the event happen overnight. When Lorelai goes to thank Luke, he says: “I just like to see you happy.” It’s so simple, too simple, for a romance that had been teasing viewers for seven years, but that’s Luke perfectly summed up in seven words. At that moment, we think back to all the times — substituting decaf, rushing Lorelai to the hospital, moving Rory into Yale, building a hoopa or ice rink, etc. — Luke just wanted her to be happy. It’s through those acts, the kind which nobody else would ever think to do, that Luke expresses love. And, as Richard rightfully comments to Lorelai, “It takes a remarkable person to inspire all of this.” Here, here, Dick, you honeytongued devil. Oh, my. –Matt Melis

Gilmost Line: “In my official capacity as town sash presenter, I’d like to present you with this sash, which I also happened to make in my official capacity as town sash maker.” “Wow, that’s quite a sash.” “I got the material from one of mother’s nighties.” “Eww.” –Kirk Gleason and Lorelai

Gilmost Meal: 300 hot dogs, 250 burgers, and enough buns, no brats.

Only in Stars Hollow: The town planned to reenact Rory’s Yale graduation ceremony — complete with high school marching band — for all those who couldn’t be at the actual graduation.

Lane’s Mix: “Inside Out” by The Mighty Lemon Drops

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05. A House Is Not a Home

Season: 05

Episode #: 22

Original Air Date: May 17, 2005

There’s been a lot of talk on this list about Lauren Graham’s best moments, but here, without question, is her best episode. It begins with her nervously asking a police officer about if Rory’s going to end up in the system (“and also, what is the system?”) and ends with her asking Luke, a man who loves Rory nearly as much as she does, to marry her. So much about this story seems inevitable, from Rory’s meltdown in the face of perceived failure (Season 1’s “The Deer Hunters”) to Luke’s constant presence in their lives being the thing that finally convinces Lorelai that she’s found the right man (“Forgiveness and Stuff”). It’s the Gilmore’s betrayal that looms largest, however — after five seasons of slowly growing to trust her parents again, Lorelai reaches out to them in a crisis, only to find control wrested away from her. For the first time, there’s nothing she can do for her daughter, and a lifetime of hurt comes barrelling back. Is it any surprise that, in the episode’s final moments, she reaches out to the only person in whom her trust is absolute? –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “Rory, the penal system is not something we enjoy. It’s something with a name that makes us giggle.” –Lorelai Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Half a loaf of stale bread and a glass of water. It’s a joke meal, but it still counts.

Only in Stars Hollow: “Big hole!” “Big hole!” “BIG HOLE!”

Lane’s Mix: “Chain Gang” by Sam Cooke

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04. Friday Night’s Alright for Fighting

Season: 06

Episode #: 13

Original Air Date: Jan. 31, 2006

Friday night dinners at Richard and Emily’s are a thing of legend. Equal parts fine dining, Inquisition, and Royal Rumble, over the years we’ve seen secrets pried loose, wounds inflicted and reopened, and many a prospective suitor thrown to the lions — all promptly at seven following martinis. But one dinner stands out among all the others. Midway through Season 6 — amid Luke postponing he and Lorelai’s wedding due to the April situation, Rory abandoning the pool house without notice, and Christopher beginning to pay for Yale — Lorelai and Rory arrive at dinner to find Richard fretting over the taste of ice and Emily painting moonscapes outdoors in 40-degree weather. It’s the calm before the storm to end all storms. In a three-minute burst that covers everything from Lorelai getting pregnant two decades ago to Emily and Christopher trying to break up Lorelai and Luke to Emily timesharing an airplane, it’s a scathing free-for-all, shot with quick camera pans and intermittent moments of civility and laughter, that leaves the entire family emotionally drained and slumped on Emily’s fine living room furniture by night’s end. Nearly 40 years of emotional baggage gets unpacked in a single evening. Would anyone care for a drink? Yes, and keep ’em coming. –Matt Melis 

Gilmost Line: “I only wish I had remembered to call her a cocktail waitress.” “Ooooh, that’s my mother’s version of the ‘C’ word.” –Emily and Lorelai Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: European hot chocolate, “it’s like mud, but chocolaty.”

Only at Yale: Editor-in-Chief and mein Führer Paris Geller, three months into her reign at the Yale Daily News, goes John Nash and holes up in her bunker, newsroom cubicles pushed together with a corrugated tin roof, as almost all of her staff quit and the paper comes within a last-second Huntzberger miracle of not coming out.

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03. Raincoats and Recipes

Season: 04

Episode #: 22

Original Air Date: May 18, 2004

Gilmore Girls has a hell of a knack for endings — all six season finales and the series finale can be found on this list — but this one is the best, a knockout one-two punch that sees Lorelai and Luke finally getting it the hell together just before Rory and Dean get it the hell on. Episode writer Amy Sherman-Palladino packs 44 minutes with plenty of Stars Hollow whimsy, from the late-arriving doors to the shoe-eating tendencies of Paw-Paw and Chin-Chin, and until the final moments, it feels like a fairly typical episode of the series, if an exemplary one. But from the moment that Luke tells Lorelai to just stand still, all bets are off. A kiss interrupted by a screaming Kirk gives way to Lorelai’s discovery of Rory and Dean’s affair, a moment as startling and unexpected as any in the series. It’s a moment that signals Rory’s adulthood while emphasizing her naivete, and Alexis Bledel conveys a young woman’s confusion, remorse, anger, and heartbreak with devastating simplicity. Coarse though it may be to say, there’s no better season-ender than the one that ended with a bang. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “What, I’m just saying, I’m surprised that Luke can waltz.” “That sounded more like, ‘I’m surprised I still have my clothes on.’” –Lorelai and Rory Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Two radish roses for a carrot curl.

Only in Stars Hollow: Kirk creates a contingency plan for his night terrors — it involves Luke.

Lane’s Mix: “Satellite of Love” by Lou Reed

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02. They Shoot Gilmores, Don’t They?

Season: 03

Episode #: 07

Original Air Date: Nov. 12, 2002

Rory takes after Lorelai in many ways. One of which is that there is never just one boy who has eyes for her; there’s always at least one other pining from the sidelines. At first, it was Tristan, then Jess, and, after this episode, Dean. We could say, “Hallelujah, it’s raining hunks,” but in reality, it’s not easy making a relationship work when your boyfriend feels constantly threatened by rivals. The Stars Hollow annual 24-hour dance marathon should’ve been a fun shindig of throwback outfits, lindy hopping, and laughing at a punch-drunk Taylor, but it turned heartbreaking when Dean, fed up with Rory’s obsession over Jess, dumps her on the dance floor in front of the entire town — or at least whoever was still awake. Whether it was an instance of taking the one you’re with for granted or just a young girl feeling her heart pulling her in another direction, Rory, once a shy bookworm too afraid to speak to boys, is quickly learning what Nazareth has been singing to us for years: love hurts. Now, go soak those feet in Epsom salt and that heartache in a gallon of ice cream. –Matt Melis      

Gilmost Line: “I can’t even open my eyes.” “That’s okay, there’s nothing to see: Kirk’s in a Speedo, Taylor’s in a skirt, Al’s in assless chaps.” “Oh, my God, stop. I’m never going to be able to close my eyes again.” –Rory and Lorelai Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Mrs. Kim’s egg-colored, eggless egg salad sandwiches and a Dancing with the Devil pamphlet.

Only in Stars Hollow: The town holds a 24-hour charity dance marathon to raise money for a tarp to cover the old bridge they now have the money to restore thanks to the proceeds from the recent Tennessee Williams look-alike contest.

Lane’s Mix: “In the Mood” by Glenn Miller

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01. Wedding Bell Blues

Season: 05

Episode #: 13

Original Air Date: Feb. 8, 2005

It’s no coincidence that the single best episode of Gilmore Girls — the series’ 100th — hangs on the complicated, loving, but frequently damaging relationship between Lorelai and Emily Gilmore. As Emily, Kelly Bishop lends the show no shortage of depth and charm, making it sometimes easy to forget that her meddling can move past annoying and well into deeply hurtful. In “Wedding Bell Blues”, Emily manages to manipulate Lorelai and Rory into throwing an unplanned bachelorette party for her, a scene that’s mostly charming and just the warm-up act for the main event. The drama that ensues at Richard and Emily’s re-commitment ceremony sends shock waves that echo through the series’ remaining episodes, changing the dynamics of nearly all the show’s major relationships and giving Alexis Bledel, Bishop, Edward Herrmann, Scott Patterson, David Sutcliffe, and especially Lauren Graham a chance to do some of their best work.

Even the rockiest episodes of Gilmore Girls can be celebrated for their acting and (mostly) their writing, but “Wedding Bell Blues” also has the distinction of being one of the most beautifully shot episodes in the series’ run. It’s uncharacteristically cinematic at times, from sweeping shots of the ceremony to that final, devastating family portrait. As the camera slowly moves in on the faces of Graham and Bishop, ready to catch one simple, awful line, their expressions betray almost nothing. These are two women well-practiced in the art of smiling through distress, and writer-director Amy Sherman-Palladino captures decades of pain and anger in the barest, simplest glance.

“You and me, we’re done,” Lorelai states flatly. Luckily for us, they weren’t. –Allison Shoemaker

Gilmost Line: “Isn’t she hilarious? I never have any idea what she’s talking about, but she’s so entertaining, like a chimp. Isn’t she like a chimp, Gypsy?” –Emily Gilmore

Gilmost Meal: Tater tots, pizza tower, multi-colored marshmallows, and whatever else was on the menu for the Cop Rock marathon.

Only in Stars Hollow: can Lorelai get every woman in town over to her house for her mother’s impromptu bachelorette party without advance notice.

Lane’s Mix: “Wedding Bell Blues” by The 5th Dimension

 

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