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Friends star David Schwimmer “swears” he isn’t the viral beer thief — and he made a video to prove it

on October 24, 2018, 10:52pm

Oh, what a time to be alive: Last month, a man who bears a striking resemblance to actor David Schwimmer robbed a convenience store in the seaside town of Blackpool, England. When the Lancashire constabulary posted about the incident on its Facebook page, prompting their followers to come forward with any information, they more or less broke the Internet with countless Friends gags and trivia.

As CNN reports, the original post has thus far generated more than 100,000 comments and has been shared more than 65,000 times. At this point, the well has run dry with Ross Geller jokes, though the MVP of ’em all is the Dumfries Police, who jokingly warned: “If you see him keep away. He is known to have studied Karate and we believe he has mastered the art of Unagi, the state of total awareness.”

Early Wednesday morning, Schwimmer finally responded to the news by spoofing the incident with a tongue-in-cheek video that he shared on his Twitter account. “Officers, I swear it wasn’t me,” he writes, “As you can see, I was in New York. To the hardworking Blackpool Police, good luck with the investigation.” Catch the clip below.

Although there’s been no development on the case — ha, like anyone really cares at this point — the Lancashire constabulary had already cleared Schwimmer long before he responded. “Thank you to everyone for your speedy responses,” they wrote in a statement. “We have investigated this matter thoroughly and have confirmed that David Schwimmer was in America on this date. We’re so sorry it has to be this way.”

At the very least, we’ve learned that everyone still loves Friends.

For comparison sake, here’s the actual bandit:

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